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A new chapter for princess

There are moments in life that remind you that you are getting older. I had one of those moments yesterday. Earlier this week my daughter announced to her mother and I that she would be moving out at the end of the week. I knew that it was coming so the announcement was not a big surprise.

What did surprise me were the mixed emotions that I am still experiencing. For the last 20 years we have watched our “princess” grow from one stage of life to the next. We knew that this day was coming and like most parents we are hoping that we did a good enough job with raising her, that she will be successful in life.

A co worker and friend, said it best on one of my Facebook posts last night in a question.   “Parenting is a tough gig, isn’t it?” My friend can relate to what Katy and I are going through, because she has adult children of her own. Another one of my friends at work said something else earlier this week. “Sometimes you have to show your children tough love”.

We love our children and we want the very best for them. Even still , we do not want our kids to face the same consequences we did , because of stupid decisions we made when we were younger. Living life on your own is the best teacher. You make decisions and you live through the consequences. As parents, our goal is to instill some common sense and wisdom into our young people.

How transparent should we be with our young people? I believe that a certain degree of honesty and transparency is necessary when we are talking to our kids. We do not have to share all of our deep and dark secrets with them. What we should do is be honest enough to admit that we do not know it all. We should be able to say “when I was this age I made this mistake and this is what I learned the hard way.”

All in all, Katy and I are very blessed to have good children. I know that our kids could have made things much harder on themselves and us had they chosen to. I believe the fact that they did not do some of the things you hear about from others, is a testament to the fact that they are good people.

One of the things I will not miss is the house full of teenagers at all hours of the night and early mornings. Yes, we love the fact that the teenagers and young adults like to come over and hang out with our kids. Being awakened at 3 am after the young people get back from a concert has gotten a bit irritating. Katy and I both work and we need our sleep.

One of the things I suppose I will miss is the weekly change that our daughter likes to make with the body piercings, tattoos and multi colored hair.   Just last week she dyed her hair bright red in honor of Halloween.   One of my previous pastors keeps reminding me that my young people are going through the period of “individualization”. That stage I life where they are defining who they are and where they want to go in life.

Kristina Halloween 2012.jpeg

Now that the room is empty and cleaned for the most part, we will have to move forward with our plans. We are planning on painting the walls a different color other than pink. The bedroom is pink and so is the bathroom.   While we are at it we are going to repaint the bathroom too.   I think we are going to make an office out of the room. A place of quiet and solitude where Katy or I can study, write or just be alone.

No matter how many changes we make to the bedroom it will always be remembered as our daughters bedroom. I am happy that our princess moved out on her own and that there were no bridges burned in the process. No matter what happens in her life we will always love her and be there for her as much as we can.

I am looking forward to watching our princess bloom as she begins to write new chapters of her life, as she learns how to navigate through the following days and years.

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